If you had told me a few years ago that I’d be counting down the days to Christmas like a kid, I’d have laughed and shrugged it off. Somewhere along the way, the holiday lost its sparkle for me. Maybe it was the exhaustion of adult responsibilities—working long hours, the pressure of holiday shopping, or the endless cycle of events that felt more like obligations than celebrations. But, more than the do-to lists, my trust in a loving God had been shattered and Christmas is full of beautiful hymns and symbols that caused me pain.
Who can you turn to in this situation? I felt so alone, full of shame, and wanted to disappear all together. I still set out my decorations, although simplified down. I sat among the Christmas tree lights and tried to encourage a warm and fuzzy feeling.
A thumbnail on my YouTube caught my eye and I was compelled to click. It was about Yule. The video was cozy and full of symbolism of the season in nature. I felt like a young girl having a story read to her. It was magical.
The winter solstice is a celebration of light. It was just the right shift in perspective I needed. I was feeling so dark and dreary and a focus on light, the coming of more light, sounded like a Godsend. I think it was.
So, on December 21st I made a lovely roast chicken and root vegetables. These would have been some of that last fresh foods left from that years harvest. I crafted
a beautiful sun shaped bread loaf, and my first yule log dessert. Yummy! We ate by candellight and wrote wishes on flyaway paper to set our intentions.
I was grateful my family was willing to try something new, Creating a new unexpected celebration was just the spark I needed to feel hopeful once again. So, if Christmas has lost its spark for you, take it from someone who’s been there: the magic is still there. Sometimes, you just have to slow down, look in unexpected places, and let some light in.
Here’s to finding the joy of Christmas—one new tradition and a little focus on light.
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