A Deep Dive into the Enneagram: Understanding Yourself, Empowering Growth
- Mechelle Wingle
- Aug 21
- 4 min read
Today we’re embarking on a deep and transformative journey into the Enneagram—a powerful tool for self-discovery and personal growth. I’ve learned so much from it over the years. It’s helped me understand myself and others with greater compassion and clarity. Unlike other personality frameworks, the Enneagram not only describes who you are but offers a roadmap for healing, balance, and transformation.
What Is the Enneagram?
The Enneagram is a nine-pointed geometric figure, each point representing a distinct personality type. It’s more than just a personality test—it’s a symbol of human potential and evolution. The Enneagram provides insights into your motivations, fears, virtues, and blind spots. Within the lines and connections of the diagram lie clues for growth: how we respond in stress, how we find balance, and how we can use our innate patterns to evolve.
What makes the Enneagram empowering is that it doesn’t label you or box you in. Instead, it acknowledges that your strengths and struggles are interconnected. Your biggest challenges are often the key to your growth. And when you begin to understand your personality patterns—including the uncomfortable parts—you gain the power to change your story.
The Roots and Resources
My introduction to the Enneagram came through the teachings of Richard Rohr, a spiritual teacher who brought this system to wider audiences in the 1980s. His book and videos have been foundational in my learning. More recently, I’ve been inspired by Enneagram Empowerment: Discover Your Personality Type and Unlock Your Potential by Laura Miltenberger. Her approach is practical, kind, and deeply human. I’ll include a link to her book and resources in the notes.
The Nine Personality Types
Each of the nine Enneagram types represents a core motivation and a path for growth. Though we all contain aspects of every type, one is typically dominant:
The Reformer – principled, purposeful, self-controlled
The Helper – generous, demonstrative, people-pleasing
The Achiever – adaptable, driven, image-conscious
The Individualist – expressive, dramatic, self-absorbed
The Investigator – perceptive, innovative, secretive
The Loyalist – committed, security-oriented, suspicious
The Enthusiast – spontaneous, fun-loving, scattered
The Challenger – self-confident, decisive, confrontational
The Peacemaker – easygoing, accommodating, complacent
Your type doesn’t define you—it reflects the patterns you use to navigate the world, particularly the emotional strategies you developed to feel safe, valued, or in control.
Why the Enneagram Is Empowering
What makes the Enneagram so powerful is that it invites you to own your whole self: the beautiful, the messy, and everything in between. It provides insight into:
Your core fears and motivations
Your strengths and values
Your coping mechanisms—especially the outdated ones
How you act in stress and security
How to move toward balance and authenticity
For example, I identify as a Type Two (The Helper). Under stress, I shift into behaviors typical of an Eight (The Challenger), becoming forceful in ways that don’t feel natural to me or others. But when I move into security, I draw on the creativity and self-expression of a Type Four. Creating beauty is a powerful way for me to calm down and return to myself.
Wings, Subtypes, and Stances
Beyond your dominant type, you have wings—the two numbers on either side of your type. You may lean more toward one at different life stages or situations. Using both wings in harmony helps create balance.
There are also subtypes, which reflect instinctual drives:
Social – focused on belonging and community
Sexual (one-to-one) – focused on deep connection
Self-preservation – focused on safety and physical well-being
You also have a stance or movement pattern:
Compliant (Types 1, 2, 6): move toward others
Withdrawn (Types 4, 5, 9): move away from others
Assertive (Types 3, 7, 8): move against or ahead of others
Understanding your subtype and stance adds depth and nuance to how you understand yourself and others.
The Role of Emotions and Centers
Each Enneagram type belongs to one of three centers of intelligence:
Body Center (8, 9, 1): driven by anger and gut instinct
Heart Center (2, 3, 4): driven by shame and emotion
Head Center (5, 6, 7): driven by fear and thinking
Your dominant center influences how you perceive and process the world. But true growth comes from integrating all three centers—thinking, feeling, and sensing.
Self-Compassion and Growth
A central theme in Enneagram Empowerment is self-compassion. As you explore your type, be kind to yourself. Your patterns often originated as survival strategies, especially in childhood. They may have outlived their usefulness but still feel like home.
The Enneagram isn’t about becoming someone else—it’s about becoming more of who you truly are.
“Growth only happens when you accept yourself with compassion and seek freedom from unhelpful patterns.”
As you recognize your core fears and irrational thoughts, you can learn new, empowered ways of thinking and acting. This often includes setting healthy boundaries, uncovering your core values, and shifting your thought patterns—especially those that trap you in shame, fear, or anger.
The Power of Understanding
Learning the Enneagram also transforms your relationships. You’ll start to see why others act the way they do—not to frustrate you, but because they’re wearing different “glasses” than you are. Their behavior starts to make more sense, and you respond with greater compassion and curiosity.
Whether it’s your partner, child, coworker, or friend, understanding their Enneagram type can bridge gaps and bring more empathy and healing to your connection.
What’s Next?
This post is just the beginning. In future posts, I’ll dive deeply into each of the nine types—exploring their core motivations, gifts, challenges, and growth paths. Whether you know your type or not, I encourage you to read about them all. You’ll recognize yourself and others, and you’ll build a map of human behavior that makes life a lot more manageable—and beautiful.
This journey is about becoming more whole. We’ll use the Enneagram not as a mirror to judge ourselves, but as a guide to return home.
See you next time as we explore Type One: The Reformer.
Learn more about your type in our Ebooks for each type.
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